Hey guys,
yeah it's been a while- i know..reasons are so far and in between..A lot has really happened in my life basically in the last 3 months. its been the most drama-filled months of my year, so where do i start from? Hmmmm...lemme back up a bit to August 17th..
AUGUST 17TH...to cut the very long story short, on this day, i ended what was a year and 9 months of dating..well,er..not because of infidelity issues or fights or quarrels but just because i realised that i was standing in the way of a person's destiny (sounds queer innit) but thats my story and im sticking to it.
So, inspite of the heart palpitations and hurt that comes aong with a break-up, nothing prepared me for what lay ahead..As i struggled through august, i got a call from home with the sad news that i had lost an uncle, might seem 'normal' but what made this the more hurtful was that we had d day before fasted and prayed for his recovery..and sometime during my quiet time, i actually stopped praying for his healing and told God to ease him of the pain and Let His will be done (i knew God was gonna take him)...so when the news broke, i kinda felt responsible!
I had to get to lag to be with mum and to heal my heart after my break up, started off as a good vacation and then somewhere along the line, my heart picked up a signal that had been inactive for quuuuiiiiite sometime..
i had loved this particular girl for almost all the time i had known her (7 yrs now) but had never had the chance to say it cos at the point i want to, someone beats me to it..so i was 'content' with just being her 'angel on earth' looking out for her and stuff like that! Maybe its d breakup that awakened me to the feelings that were always there but i saw a possibility of 'US' happening...we had being chatting on BB thruout my 'vacation' and one night she tells me a friend of mine asked her out..so im like.."this time i have to let her know what i feel so she can make her decision"
Long story short...after 3weeks in lag, a burial ceremony and a time of rest, she eventually gives me an answer and its not positive...so yeah! im back in the same hole i left..back to the hurt and the pain! so basically, this explains my absence but not to worry, im still gonna drop stuff to bless you and aid in your quest for your heart's desire...
This is just the state of my heart right now, i just thot id share this with you..
Have fun guys!
Re - the bit bout praying 4 God's will re ur uncle - I did the exact same thing wiv my grandmum & felt the exact same way when He took her. Wat has eventuali returned me 2 a place of peace's the knowledge that 1stly, His will is always right & best & 2dly, she IS beta off now. We'll always feel the pang of loss but u knw where I am wheneva u need me. *big hug*
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